


if you whale hard enough - will you ascend into the gacha?

by dancingassassin



Category: Overwatch (Video Game)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Angst with a Happy Ending, Blackwatch Era, Cameos, Deadlock Gang, Depression, Disabled Character, Fate Grand Order - Freeform, Fate/Grand Order - Freeform, Feels, Fluff and Angst, Genji Shimada is a Little Shit, Ludger Will Kresnik - Freeform, M/M, Mobile Games, Shimada Brothers, Social Media, borderline crack fic, gratuitous FGO references
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-02-13
Updated: 2018-02-13
Packaged: 2019-03-17 17:10:12
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 12,993
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13663536
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/dancingassassin/pseuds/dancingassassin
Summary: While the clan elders control most of Hanzo Shimada's life, they can't control what games he plays on his phone. Both Hanzo and Genji are very into the game Fate/Grand Order - it makes them happy, gives them an outlet to deal with the stress of their lives. They're big in the community - posting guides, making videos, all sorts of things. Hanzo never really realizes how many people he touched.They try to run away from the Shimada. They're caught. It doesn't go well.Hanzo loses everything and falls further and further into self loathing and depression as the clan uses him as a glorified weapon. He never realizes that people might be missing him - that people CARE about him.In a turn of fate, Hanzo gets taken by Deadlock. Hanzo finds friends and hope. And eventually he gets that Fate/Grand Order account back.--This description doesn't really cover it, but I'm not sure how else I should phrase it.Also, this is super self-indulgent.





	if you whale hard enough - will you ascend into the gacha?

It was so rare for Hanzo and Genji to get a day off from Shimada family business, much less enough in a row for them to go on a mini vacation. Yet they'd managed to get several days off to make a trip to Tokyo for a Fate/Grand Order event. He was thrilled to actually be at one of the events. It was silly to get so invested in a mobile game, but Hanzo loved his pixel husbands and liked the story. A lot.

“Anija! Let's get a selfie for the Reddit crew.” Genji was all grins as he held his phone out. “And before you go ‘we can't show our faces, can't dishonor blah blah blah,’ we can block out our faces before we post it.” He pulled his face into a comically serious expression and dropped his voice into an impression of Hanzo’s.

Hanzo bit back his retort about Genji being wrong, because he knew it was true. That was exactly what he was going to say. He just didn't want to admit that his younger brother was right. “Alright, but only the one, okay?”

“Aww, but what if it's a bad selfie? C'mon, live a little.”

Hanzo knew that if he didn't relent, Genji was going to start doing the puppy dog pout. The puppy dog pout that Hanzo was embarrassed to say still worked on him. There was no reason for that kind of look to work on someone who was in their twenties and only served to highlight that Hanzo was far softer than he projected.

“Fine, but just know that you're ridiculous, Sparrow.”

“Of course I am, but you are too, Hanzo~” Genji hooked an arm around Hanzo’s shoulders and angled the camera so they were both in frame. “Now smile, even if we’re covering our faces up. They’ll _know_.”

Hanzo rolled his eyes, but complied with his brother’s request. He even flashed a peace sign. It all seemed a bit ridiculous, especially since Genji absolutely insisted on taking what felt like _millions_ of selfies. But…it was nice. Hanzo was having fun…he actually felt like a young adult rather than the Shimada heir. It was just…nice.

 

* * *

 

 

 **it’s your friend’s Merlin!** @SimpleGeometry: hello FGO event! @Sparrow and i are about to go and get our event craft essences. maybe it’ll be something good! #probablynot #probablymysticcodeexpup

 

 **the mobage life** @praisegrailkun: omg I’m there too, maybe we can meet up @SimpleGeometry @Sparrow

 

 **kiyohime is best waifu** @yanderes_r_us: I’m there too, @SimpleGeometry, @Sparrow and @praisegrailkun! Someone said the craft essence is actually good??

 

 **it’s your friend’s Merlin!** @SimpleGeometry: @Sparrow @praisegrailkun @yanderes_r_us huh, who would have guessed that they’d give us something useful. And maybe we will see each other ♪(ﾟ▽^*)ﾉ⌒☆

 

 **the mobage life** @praisegrailkun: @SimpleGeometry @Sparrow @yanderes_r_us BUT WE DON’T KNOW WHAT YOU LOOK LIKE!

 

 **who said the quick meta is dead?** @Sparrow: @yanderes_r_us @praisegrailkun @SimpleGeometry likes feeling mysterious, he’s not going to tell you what he looks like! (｡•̀ᴗ-)✧

* * *

 

 

“Have you edited them yet? We should definitely post the pic soon.” Genji prodded Hanzo’s side. “People are gonna love it, I promise.”

“Working on it. You wanted Cursed Arm Hassan, yeah?” Hanzo had already chosen the best looking selfie, fixed some of the lighting, hidden some other very distinguishable marks (their tattoos), and was in the process of positioning a Learning with Manga style doodle that Genji did for him of summer Merlin with support stats superimposed on him over his face. “People are going to say stupid things.”

He was already anticipating the weird and stupid comments, but it wasn’t like he _wasn’t_ used to that sort of thing. Hanzo browsed the internet and played a mobile game with questionable roots. He saw _weird_ things.

“Well duh, it’s the internet. And yes, I want Cursed Arm Hassan, assassins are as close to ninja as you can get.” His brother paused in his chattering and shot Hanzo a perplexed look. “…why aren’t you picking an archer? You _are_ an archer…not a caster…”

Hanzo snorted and shrugged. “Because I _am_ the person with the level 100, NP5 Merlin with skills at 10/10/10.” _And because I didn’t want to be predictable and pick an archer. And which archer would I pick anyway, Arjuna?_ Like hell was he going to pick the archer that wants to kill his brother.

“Wait. You’re meme-ing. You fucking nerd!” Genji laughed and nudged him hard enough that his chair slid a little. “Who knew you could meme? I thought you were too serious for it, anija. I’m so proud of you!”

_And just when I thought he couldn’t get **more** ridiculous…_

“I am not meme-ing, I am being serious.” Hanzo deadpanned as he plunked the Learning with Manga version of Cursed Arm Hassan over Genji’s face. He had to admit that the selfie was pretty funny with the Fate characters covering their faces.

“You’re _too_ serious.” Genji groused, but there was an edge in his voice that let Hanzo know the topic was shifting toward more serious topics. “We barely hang out anymore, Hanzo. And they get so mad at you when you do _anything_ fun…”

Hanzo sighed and rubbed at his face – he didn’t really want to have the ‘clan elders are killing you’ discussion again, but he supposed there wasn’t any way to really stop it. Genji was rightfully concerned. The elders _were_ making his life a living hell for having the gall to try and do anything that made him happy…including spending time with his younger brother.

“I know…I’m trying…” Hanzo’s shoulders slumped as he leaned back in his chair and stared at the computer screen rather than meeting his younger brother’s eyes. Meeting Genji’s gaze would let him know that Hanzo didn’t know how to handle this – he didn’t know how to get the elders off his back…

After a moment of silence, Genji finally spoke again. “…you have plans just in case, right?”

He didn’t need to ask what Genji meant by ‘just in case.’ He was talking about a contingency plan in case the elders pushed him too far, or made an attempt on his life, or _anything_ like that. It was fucked up that they had to think about those sorts of things at all, much less in reference to people who were basically _family_.

“Yeah. Have a bank account, paypal, and an emergency credit card.” Hanzo replied evenly, like he was talking about what he’d eaten for breakfast, not his plans to escape his family. “They won’t find them.” Hanzo had been careful. He didn’t use his actual name on any of them – he used an alias that he didn’t use with Shimada business.  In theory, the elders wouldn’t be able to find any of the accounts.

Genji hummed in approval and then silence fell between them again. Hanzo fidgeted before going back to editing the photo. Once he deemed it ‘good enough,’ he pulled up Reddit to type up a post.

 

 

 

 

> **[fluff]:** SimpleGeometry and Sparrow at Tokyo Fate/Grand Order Event!
> 
> Submitted 1 minute ago by _SimpleGeometry_
> 
>  
> 
> Hey! Sparrow and I had a blast at the FGO event in Tokyo. Here’s a pic of the two of us there. Was anyone else at the event? Maybe we saw each other and didn’t realize it.
> 
> The free craft essence they gave out is pretty cool looking too, don’t you think? And at least _kind of_ useful. I’ll toss it onto my support so you guys can use it. Let me know which servant you think would benefit best and I’ll see what I can do (^_−)☆
> 
> -SG

 

Hanzo read over the post a few times and then nodded to himself. It sounded good to him and Genji flashed a thumbs-up after reading it, so he hit post. A little smile tugged at the corners of his lips – sure, his life was pretty shitty most of the time, but at least he could smile about a mobile game.

…

Though maybe that was a little pathetic…that a mobile game was one of the only things that made him smile.

Genji was right…he really needed to have stuff ready in case they needed to bolt.

 

* * *

 

 

Pain – that was all Hanzo could comprehend at the moment. He hit the ground hard and wheezed when the air hissed from his lungs. One of the elders – Maeda – was standing over him with the heel of his right foot digging into Hanzo’s ribcage. He didn’t dare make a sound of pain, he didn’t want to give them more reason to punish him and _oh boy_ did they have reason to this time.

He and Genji tried to escape.

Obviously it didn’t go as planned.

“It is clear that your brother is a terrible influence on you.” The boot pressed harder against his sensitive floating ribs. “And that issue will be rectified, young master. There will be no abandoning your duty. You will not run away again.”

Hanzo felt his chest clench and he struggled under Maeda’s boot. “…what do you mean?”

He didn’t want to know, he already knew in his heart what it meant, but…

He was hoping…

“Your brother will be dealt with.”

Hanzo’s hopes shattered around him – he knew what those words meant. He knew _exactly_ what they meant. They were going to try and kill his younger brother. Hanzo couldn’t let them, he wouldn’t, he refused to let them hurt Genji! He tried to shove Maeda’s foot away from him. “No…! I won’t…I refuse…!!”

“You do not have a choice.”

Hanzo’s vision whited out as pain flashed through his body. It took him a second to piece together what happened – and even then he couldn’t be sure. But his ribs felt like they’d been stomped on. He tried to fight, he really did, but each time he moved, something was hit or stomped on, until he could barely bring himself to breathe.

_I’m sorry, Genji…_

He was barely aware as he was dragged away to another room, his vision was fuzzy and he could taste blood in his mouth. Hanzo groaned in pain as his back smacked against a slab of some sort, but made no attempts to stop what was happening, he wasn’t sure if he _could_. His phone tumbled out of his pocket and he futilely reached for it, his only contact to the outside world, his only chance of freedom---

A guard crushed it under the heel of his boot.

_I’m so sorry, Genji…I’m sorry...I'm sorry I was so weak..._

 

* * *

 

 **the mobage life** @praisegrailkun: hey, has anyone heard from @SimpleGeometry lately? or @Sparrow? they haven’t logged in for a few days…

 

 **kiyohime is best waifu** @yanderes_r_us: @praisegrailkun @SimpleGeometry @Sparrow they haven’t been active on social media…maybe they’re out of the country or something?

 

 **the mobage life** @praisegrailkun: @yanderes_r_us @SimpleGeometry @Sparrow you’re probably right. hah, it’s just weird to see them not log in, you know?

 

* * *

 

 

 

 

 

> **[discussion]:** SimpleGeometry and Sparrow missing??
> 
> Submitted 1hr ago by _apologems_
> 
>  
> 
> Look, I know it’s weird and kinda stalker-y to be making this post, but it’s been about two weeks since anyone heard from them and well…
> 
> I’m getting worried?
> 
> Has anyone heard from them? Does anyone know them in person?
> 
> They’re both really nice, I hope they’re okay.

 

 

 

 

> _bestgirlscathach_ [score hidden] 50 minutes ago
> 
> I haven’t seen either of them log in, but I can check with some of the discord groups to see if either of them logged in there?

 

 

 

 

> _MerlinAlterPls_ [score hidden] 30 minutes ago
> 
> Maybe they’re both done with the game.

 

 

 

 

> _justanothersaberface_ [score hidden] 10 minutes ago
> 
> With as much as SG whaled? Unlikely.

 

 

 

 

> _bestgirlscathach_ [score hidden] 5 minutes ago
> 
> Yeah, no one on discord has heard from them either…

 

* * *

 

 

[1:15am] **Give Jack Pants:** does anyone have contact information for Sparrow or SG? Like their emails? It’s been months since either of them were seen online…

[1:17am] **mashu mashu mashu:** i think they kept those pretty quiet. both of them are super private, aren’t they?

[1:18am] **Give Jack Pants:** well, yeah…but maybe _someone_ has an email for them…?

[1:21am] **bring back KNK collab pls:** I have SG’s paypal email because I bought a starter account off of him, but that’s all I’ve got?

[1:30am] **Give Jack Pants:** would you mind giving it out? I’m just worried…maybe he’ll respond to email…

[1:50am] **bring back KNK collab pls:** I don’t mind. It’s: [SimpleGeometry@thedragonhungers.io](mailto:SimpleGeometry@thedragonhungers.io)

[2:15am] **lulu says nya:** maybe I’ll send him a little bit of money…maybe he got in an accident or something…?

[2:30am] **mashu mashu mashu:** not a bad idea – i really hope he and Sparrow are okay…

[3:30am] **Give Jack Pants:** omg thank you so much! Just sent him an email, hopefully we get a response…

 

* * *

 

 

Hanzo hated what he’d become.

For the most part, he was kept in an underground room – if you could call it that. It was more of a cell, with bare stone walls and a small window that let light filter in for a little bit each day. Every once and awhile he was brought up to deal with those who opposed the Shimada clan.

It was the same drill each time.

The elders pretended that Hanzo still had some sort of power in the clan, cleaned him up and everything. They would sit and interrogate whoever dared cross them, and then they had Hanzo let the dragons judge the person. The dragons used to be far more merciful…they spared many…but with as caged and hostile as Hanzo felt all the time, the dragons were more likely to devour the enemies of the Shimada.

He hated it.

He would try to escape if he _could_ , but the elders rendered him helpless. They made him reliant on them for everything.

Hanzo stared down at the stumps that were just below his knees and growled under his breath.

All he could be in life was a weapon.

This was all that was left for him.

 

* * *

 

 

 **brynhildr for life** @yanderes_r_us: we miss you, @SimpleGeometry. I hope you’re okay…

 

* * *

 

 

[4:01am] **lulu says nya:** did you see that Sparrow logged back in??

[4:20am] **salt for days:** wait seriously? did he say anything on twitter or reddit??

[4:21am] **salt for days:** also, go to bed.

[4:40am] **lulu says nya:** he hasn’t said anything on social media, but his FGO account is active again. and I’m not going to bed. :T

[4:59am] **ACHILLES WHEN:** maybe SG will be back soon then. And seriously, you should go to bed

[5:15am] **lulu says nya:** no.

 

* * *

 

 

 

 

 

> **[discussion]:** theories on what happened to SimpleGeometry
> 
> Submitted by _tamamo_is_my_wife_ 3 hours ago
> 
>  
> 
> It’s been ages since anyone brought it up – but what the hell happened to SG? There’s been a few of us trying to figure out what could have happened and we’re going to post the theories here.
> 
> Theories:
> 
> -kidnapped
> 
> -illness
> 
> -car accident
> 
> -stranded on an island
> 
> -joined the Shambali

 

 

 

 

> _StepOnMeJalter_ [score hidden] 1 hour ago
> 
> -retired to England
> 
> -amnesia
> 
> -prison (but what crime would he even commit??)
> 
> -witness protection

 

 

 

 

> _I_Am_The_Rules_ [score hidden] 50 minutes ago
> 
> -mission to the moon
> 
> -joined a gang
> 
> -actually dead =(

 

 

 

> _YorokobeShounen_ [score hidden] 20 minutes ago
> 
> hey, let’s not suggest that he’s actually dead…
> 
> -prisoner of war
> 
> -bermuda triangle ate him
> 
> -he ascended into the gacha and someone will summon him

 

* * *

 

 

 **meme teams are best teams** @sumanai: hey @Sparrow – do you know anything about what happened with @SimpleGeometry?

 

 **despite everything, it’s still you** @Sparrow: @sumanai no.

 

* * *

 

 

Hanzo wasn’t entirely sure how long he had been in this situation other than _too long_ and _long enough to forget what year it was._ He found it difficult to care about anything anymore, but there wasn’t anything for him to look forward to, nothing to keep him entertained…

There was just him serving the Shimada.

But the scent of fire piqued his interest. He crawled over to the wall closest to the window and could see the flames licking up the side of the building. _Maybe the building will just collapse on me and put me out of my misery…_

He could hear people running around, gunshots, all sorts of things, but he didn’t _care_. Hanzo merely leaned against the wall and closed his eyes. There wasn’t anything he could really do, not from where he was. And taking action required him to _care_.

And he didn’t.

Hanzo drifted off for some time, at least until the sound of splintering wood snapped him back to reality. His eyes narrowed as he watched the door break in. Shimada would unlock the door, this had to be an intruder. As much as he didn’t care about much of anything, Hanzo wasn’t going to sit there and do nothing…

His eyes settled in on the intruders – two men. Both had black bandannas covering the majority of their faces, one with brown hair, the other with silver and black. Both were wearing far too much leather and were carrying shitty six shooters. From where he was, he could see a tattoo of a skull holding a lock between its teeth – they were Deadlock. _But there’s no reason for Deadlock to be out here…_

Before he could really process what was going on, another man shoved into the room from the other entrance – the hidden entrance. It was one of the elders. Maeda. “Are you completely useless? There are intruders in your home. Do something!”

Hanzo’s eyes flicked to the two men who were standing in the other door and then back to Maeda. He shook his head and picked at his nails. It felt like it had been forever since he’d done anything defiant…it probably _had_ been forever…

It felt kind of good.

“…shaming your family again. You’re a disgrace.”

Hanzo didn’t care.

“…real sorry to interrupt this touchin’ reunion, but we’ll be takin’ Shimada with us.” One of the men drawled. His tone was casual, almost lazy, but Hanzo noted that his posture was completely prepared to fire his weapon…and that his arm was completely steady.

“Do something!” Maeda took a step toward Hanzo with his hand raised.

Hanzo growled under his breath and thrust his hand in the direction of Maeda while muttering under his breath. “ _Ryu ga waga teki wo kurau!_ ”

Dazzling blue light filled the room as the dragons barreled towards Maeda and tore through him as though he were nothing. Hanzo glowered at him as Maeda shrieked and then fell to the ground motionless. The dragons dissipated without fanfare – even though there were still two men in the room. People who were threats…

“Holy fuck…what the…” The man who’d spoken before yelped out the words and stared at Hanzo with wide eyes. “…damn…”

Hanzo opened his mouth to say something, but his vision swam and his head felt like it was stuffed with cotton. He felt so weak…so exhausted… Panic flooded him as he realized he couldn’t hold onto consciousness, that he was going to pass out with strange men threatening to take him somewhere…

_Just my luck…_

Hanzo slumped over slowly as he lost consciousness.

 

* * *

 

 

 **despite everything, it’s still you** @Sparrow: please stop asking if I know what happened to @SimpleGeometry. I really don’t know anything. I wish I did.

 

* * *

 

 

[2:13am] **ACHILLES WHEN:** did you see Sparrow’s tweet? He doesn’t know what happened to SG

[2:20am] **when will waver come home to me:** yeah, I did…that’s really…concerning, you know? They knew each other IRL

[2:25am] **ACHILLES WHEN:** yeah, I know. This whole situation is so fucked up…

[2:50am] **mashu mashu mashu:** you’d think we’d actually know something after five years…but we still don’t.

[2:59am] **lulu says nya:** I sent him a bit more cash, just in case…

[3:10am] **mashu mashu mashu:** isn’t money super tight for you? be careful! AND GO TO SLEEP

[3:30am] **lulu says nya:** no.

 

* * *

 

 

Hanzo woke with a start and growled when he realized that his left wrist was handcuffed to something. He tugged a few times to no avail. _From one prison straight into another. Fucking great…_

“Hold your horses, Shimada. You’re gonna hurt yourself!”

Hanzo jolted when he realized he was not alone and cursed internally at how he hadn’t been able to notice that. He recognized the voice as one of the men who took him from the Shimada manor. His eyes settled on him – the man’s face was visible now. He was handsome in a rugged way, with stubble on his chin and messy brown hair falling into his eyes. He shook away any and all thoughts of this man being attractive and glared at him while tucking his thumb in before yanking his wrist down.

No dice. He was still restrained.

“I said hold your horses! Dammit, we’re just tryin’ to make sure you don’t hurt yourself.” Jesse put a hand on Hanzo’s wrist to keep him from trying to escape.

“Don’t touch me!” Hanzo grated the words out, his voice rough and harsh from disuse. He didn’t have much cause for speaking when he was down in his cell. He tried to tug his arm away from Jesse but was completely unable to. “Leave me alone…”

“Sorry. Can’t really leave you alone.” The man shrugged – but he did let go of Hanzo’s wrist. “Bosses told me to keep an eye on you.”

 _Lovely._ Of course Hanzo had a keeper. That was just his luck…

“Name’s Jesse McCree, pleased to meetcha. What’s your name?”

Hanzo snorted and looked out the window rather than at Jesse. “Hanzo.”

“Look, Hanzo, I get it. We kidnapped you, you’ve got every reason to hate us. But this place is a fuckin’ five star hotel in comparison to that pit you were in…might as well make the best of it.”

Hanzo twitched and glanced back at Jesse with a withering stare. “…leave me alone.”

Sure, he knew that Jesse had a point – making the best of it was better than whatever the hell he was doing now. But…

Maybe he didn’t feel like he deserved happiness.

 

* * *

 

 

Hanzo woke with a sharp yelp and gasping for breath. He could feel tears streaming down his cheeks and his body shaking. He rubbed just above his knees and winced – they always hurt after nightmares about _that_ night. About when he’d lost them. He rocked himself back and forth and waited for the pain to ease up.

“Whoa…you okay, Hanzo?” Jesse’s voice rang out from somewhere on the floor near the bed. “You were makin’ a lot of noise…you have a nightmare or something?”

Hanzo tensed and very quickly tucked his face behind his hands. _I don’t want to be seen like this…_ He didn’t want to give them a weakness to exploit, he didn’t want to hurt anymore…he didn’t want to give them ways to hurt him…

“Hey hey…it’s okay…” Jesse’s voice sounded closer now and Hanzo nearly jumped out of his skin when he felt the bed depress down further from extra weight. He very nearly recoiled when one of Jesse’s arms settled around his shoulders. “It’s okay…you’re safe now. We ain’t gonna hurt you.”

Hanzo didn’t believe him – how could he? His own _family_ maimed him and hurt him for years…somehow he didn’t think a bunch of strangers were going to be more merciful. But at the same time, he couldn’t bring himself to pull away from the warm, comforting touch. He craved it like no other, contact, being close to _someone_. It was something that had been denied for a long time… His shoulders shook from the effort of holding everything in. “I’m fine…”

He knew he didn’t sound fine, he knew he _wasn’t_ actually fine…

But he didn’t want people to see him like this…

“…you’re not. It’s okay to not be okay, you know?” Jesse’s voice was softer. “Not like any of us are gonna judge you for bein’ haunted. We’ve all got our share of ghosts.”

 _Why are you being kind to me? I don’t deserve this…I don’t deserve someone being kind to me…_ Hanzo closed his eyes and held his breath for several long seconds, until his shoulders were bucking from the effort of keeping everything in. “…hurts…”

_Why am I doing this…why am I saying anything to him??_

“I know, darlin’.” Jesse rubbed circles against Hanzo’s shoulder. “It’s gonna be okay…”

It really wouldn’t be okay, not when Hanzo knew that Deadlock was going to find a way to use him as a weapon. Just like his family had done. After all, all he was meant to be in this lifetime was a weapon. That was all he was good for…

He’d been deluded when he tried to be anything but that…

“Sorry…”

“You don’t have to be sorry.” Jesse still spoke so softly, soothingly. “You’re allowed to be upset.” He didn’t really agree with Jesse, but he didn’t voice that. No need to. “C’mon…let’s get back to sleep. Long day tomorrow…”

Hanzo felt his heart ache when Jesse pulled away, the crushing feeling of loneliness slamming into him all at once. “Okay…”

_I’m pathetic…_

He shouldn’t want someone who was his glorified captor to be close to him, to hold him while he slept, but that’s what he was craving. That’s what his body needed, to be touched, to be held. Hanzo was _starved_ for touch. It shouldn’t hurt so much to have Jesse pull away…he shouldn’t like him so much…

And it wasn’t like Jesse was going to like him anyway. Not after all the bratty shit Hanzo kept pulling…

"Wait..." Hanzo wasn't entirely sure why he spoke up - he hadn't really meant to. "Please...could you..." He looked away from Jesse and stared down at the meager blankets on the bed. "Nevermind.

"No, go ahead. What's up, Han?" Jesse looked genuinely concerned and that only made Hanzo's heart ache more.

"...don't want to be alone...sleep next to me?" He couldn't make eye contact with Jesse when he said that. He didn't want to see pity or disgust or anything like that.

"You got it, pumpkin."

There was part of him that was thrilled that Jesse was willing to cuddle up to him for the night. The other part was was embarrassed that he needed the touch of a virtual stranger to get peaceful sleep. 

* * *

 

 

 **Babylonia is Hell** @apologems: hey, does anyone have a good guide for making teams? I’m super stuck in Babylonia and really need help D:

 

 **despite everything, it’s still you** @Sparrow: @apologems this guide is a bit out of date, but it has some very useful information. I hope it helps you. google.docs.com…

 

 **Babylonia is Hell** @apologems: @Sparrow omg thank you so much?? This guide is SUPER helpful!!

 

 **despite everything, it’s still you** @Sparrow: @apologems no problem, glad it helped

 

 **500SQ no Merlin D:** @thewhaletoendallwhales: @Sparrow @apologems isn’t that @SimpleGeometry’s guide on team building?

 

 **despite everything, it’s still you** @Sparrow: @thewhaletoendallwhales @apologems ya

 

 **500SQ no Merlin D:** @thewhaletoendallwhales: @Sparrow @apologems do you know what happened to SG??

 

 **despite everything, it’s still you** @Sparrow: @thewhaletoendallwhales @apologems no, I don’t. *PLEASE* stop asking

 

* * *

 

 

Hanzo wasn’t entirely sure he went from hating every moment of life to _tolerating_ it. Maybe it was when he was given a bit of roaming privileges and a wheelchair. Maybe it was when he saw a television for the first time in five years. Maybe it was getting more than one meal a day…

There were a lot of things it could be.

But he didn’t hate everything as much anymore.

It was odd to not _dread_ waking up every day.

Though he did still hate everything that Deadlock stood for – he just chose to enjoy the presence of a few gang members. And tolerated the rest with various levels of patience.

“Hey Hanzo, lookin’ good today.”

Hanzo felt his heart speed up when he heard Jesse’s voice and felt his cheeks get a bit pink from the compliment. “Hello Jesse. Do not try and butter me up. I will not share the cookies Ludger made me.”

Maybe the cookies had something to do with his perspective on life.

“Aw…sharing is caring, you know that.” Jesse jutted his lower lip out in a puppy dog pout. “But I won’t force you to share. They’re your cookies after all.” He shrugged and leaned against the wall. “You doin’ okay today?”

“I suppose I am doing well enough.” Hanzo took a bite out of one of the cookies just to show that they were, in fact, his. “It was nice to go outside for a bit.”

“Can tell you were outside, darlin’. You’re all pink. You got sunburn.” Jesse snickered as he rooted around in his pocket before extracting his phone.

“Oh. Didn’t really realize…” But now that Jesse mentioned it, Hanzo’s skin _did_ feel too hot and too tight.

Hanzo’s eyes settled on the device and he felt a pang in his chest. Of all the technological comforts he missed, he missed having a phone the most. Most of it dealt with the fact that a phone meant he could contact people he cared about, but partly because he missed playing the stupid little games.

He opened his mouth to ask if he could poke around on Jesse’s phone, but immediately closed it. _Shouldn’t even bother. Not like I can contact Genji…the family killed him…_ And it was stupid to get back into mobile games after five years away from them. Might as well stay away from that addiction…

“Thought we might stay in and watch movies tonight? Luds is off on a short mission, so we’ve got the place to ourselves.” Jesse waggled his eyebrows in a semi-suggestive manner and smirked.

“Movies sound nice.” Hanzo nodded and tried not to look at the smirk on Jesse’s face. It wasn’t like he actually meant anything when he said things like that…right?

“…should probably get some aloe on you though…otherwise that’s gonna be real uncomfortable. Want me to help?”

Hanzo considered that for a moment. Aloe _would_ help his skin and it would be a lot easier if he had help. _And it would be nice to have Jesse’s hands on me…_ He shook that thought away before it took hold in his mind. They were just friends – nothing more. Nothing wrong with friends helping each other out…right?

“…I’d appreciate the help.” Hanzo sighed as he wheeled over to the beat up sofa.

“You okay with the bedroom instead? I’ve got a better TV in there.” Jesse rubbed the back of his head. “And it’ll be more comfortable.”

Hanzo couldn’t deny that. “That’s fine.”

Soon enough, they were both settled onto the bed and Hanzo had his shirt off. He felt a little self-conscious – he wasn’t as built as he had been before being imprisoned, but he still looked a bit okay.

“It’ll be a bit cold, lemme know if it’s too much, ok?”

Hanzo nodded and watched as Jesse took his left wrist into his hand and started smoothing the cool lotion into his arm. It was, indeed, chilly, but it felt _nice_ on his burned skin. He closed his eyes and hummed softly.

“Feels pretty good. Thanks, Jess.”

“Not a problem, sunshine. I’ll have to get you some sunscreen.” Jesse chuckled. Then he made a soft, confused sound. “Huh…didn’t notice those before…” A finger flicked across the piercing in one of Hanzo’s nipples.

Hanzo jolted and squeaked – his cheeks were flushing bright red and he couldn’t meet Jesse’s eyes.

“Aw hell, sorry sugar. Didn’t mean to do that. Just…uh…yeah. Shiny object syndrome. Sorry.” With that, Jesse went back to rubbing lotion into Hanzo’s skin. He moved on to Hanzo’s right arm.

And Hanzo was left with his heart pounding and his cheeks flushing so red he felt like his face was on fire. It had been so long since someone had touched him there that even that short touch was enough to throw him off balance. But again…it wasn’t like it meant anything…

Awkward silence fell between the two of them – it wasn’t like Hanzo knew what to say after something like that.

“So uh…did your girlfriend like ‘em?” Jesse cleared his throat. “Those piercings?”

Hanzo coughed and shook his head. “That would require me to be attracted to women.”

_That’s probably going to make things awkward…_

“Oh. Huh. Um…did your boyfriends like it then?”

 _…or he’ll just roll with it?_ Hanzo wasn’t sure what to make of the questions – they were only serving to make his face even redder than before. Apparently five years of being imprisoned made him prone to getting flustered.

“ _I_ like them.” Hanzo managed to get the words out. “…but my boyfriends liked them too.”

He didn’t expect Jesse to laugh – but the man’s warm chuckle filled the room. “Looks like our boyfriends had similar taste. They liked my piercings too.”

“Oh…? You have piercings?” Hanzo was genuinely curious – but at this point he just wanted to ask so attention would be off of _his_ piercings.

Jesse nodded and then poked his tongue out – there was a piercing a bit further back on the tongue than usual. Hanzo swallowed dryly and felt his heart start beating even faster. _Damn…_

“Well, can’t blame them for liking that.” He bit his lower lip and then looked away. “But you said piercings…so multiple, right? What else is pierced?”

Jesse hummed and then snickered as his hands slowed. “…hm…ask real nice and I might show you one day.” He winked and Hanzo felt the air leave his lungs like he’d been punched.

“…well, looking forward to that day then.” Hanzo hummed – pleased that his voice didn’t shake or tremble or anything like that.  He was even more pleased that Jesse blushed at that. Good, he didn’t want to be the only one blushing.

Jesse cleared his throat and continued rubbing aloe lotion into Hanzo’s right arm. “…gotta get your back and shoulders too, pumpkin. You okay with me sitting behind you?”

Hanzo appreciated Jesse asking – people being behind him was something that made him more than a little jittery. But he didn’t think he’d be too nervous with Jesse sitting behind him. _Bad Shimada, your crush is showing. You two are just friends, nothing more._

“Yeah, that’s fine.”

Hanzo felt Jesse shift so he was behind him – and only then did he realize how intimate the position could be. He could feel Jesse’s warmth radiating toward him, hear his breathing…it was just nice. He jumped a little when the cool lotion touched his skin, but mumbled that he was fine, that Jesse should keep going.

“Didn’t really expect you to say that, you know. Don’t seem the type.”

Hanzo quirked a brow up and peered over his shoulder a little. “…no? why not?”

“Prim and proper Shimada heir? Seem more like you’d be runnin’ around a country club. Dirty American cowboy doesn’t seem your type.”

_I shouldn’t read that as ‘I don’t seem like your type’ but…_

He supposed that was a reasonable assumption, but it was far from the truth. “Country clubs are boring. I have pierced nipples and tried to run away from home, I think dirty American cowboy suits me just fine.”

It felt like Jesse was closer to him now, very nearly pressed against his back. And his hands weren’t really moving anymore…they were just kind of resting against Hanzo’s shoulders.

“Really now…you like bad boys then? The ones you can’t take home to your mother?”

Hanzo’s heart skipped a beat when he could feel Jesse’s breath against his neck. _I shouldn’t keep flirting…_ “Maybe…is that a problem?” _Goddammit, Shimada…_

“Not a problem at all.” Jesse’s voice was softer than before and so close to Hanzo’s ear. Close enough that a shiver ran down Hanzo’s spine. “…I like the ones who go against the crowd…being pretty doesn’t hurt either.”

 _Maybe he really does like me…?_ He shivered at how close they were at the moment, at the thoughts running through his mind. _I really want him to kiss me._ That wasn’t a thought he should be having, not at all. Yet…Hanzo wanted to let himself feel _good_ for once. He liked Jesse…he had for a while now…but…

Even with all the flirting, Hanzo wasn’t completely certain that Jesse actually liked him…that he was serious…

“…so…you like pretty guys…and I like bad boys.” Hanzo whispered as he turned his head to the side, lips so close to Jesse’s, barely two inches away. An invitation.

“Seems so…maybe…” Jesse was leaning in closer and closer until finally his lips pressed against Hanzo’s in a soft, very nearly chaste kiss.

It was like his mind whited out – all he could focus on was the sensation of the lips together, at how gentle Jesse was, on how he wanted _more_. Hanzo let their lips linger together for a few extra seconds before pulling back.

“…I liked that…” He murmured, just loud enough for Jesse to hear. He wanted him to know that this was okay.

His heart hammered in his chest as Jesse kissed him again, this time a bit deeper, a bit more heated. It was scary, letting himself be vulnerable like this with someone. But for the first time in ages, Hanzo was letting himself be happy, letting himself _feel good_.

 

* * *

 

 

 **mashu potatoes** @the_gacha_hates_me: …looks like @SimpleGeometry isn’t ever coming back…

 

 **the mobage life** @praisegrailkun: @the_gacha_hates_me @SimpleGeometry it’s a shame, he was a really nice guy. Wherever he is, I hope he’s okay.

 

 **mashu potatoes** @the_gacha_hates_me: @praisegrailkun @SimpleGeometry he had the best guides and his gacha pull videos were hilarious, even if he hid his face all the time. I miss him (╯︵╰,)

 

 **the mobage life** @praisegrailkun: @the_gacha_hates_me @SimpleGeometry right??? I’m still so pissed that I missed the chance to meet him. (◞‸◟；)

 

* * *

 

 

Hanzo jolted awake at the sound of _a lot_ of movement outside and odd unease creeping through his body. He shifted in Jesse’s arms and nudged him – something wasn’t right. It was the middle of the night…there was no reason for there to be that much noise. None at all.

“…what’s wrong, Hanners?” Jesse mumbled, voice thick with sleep.

“…something’s wrong. Sounds like there’s a lot of people outside.” Hanzo whispered.

“Oh fuck.” Jesse sat up and grabbed Hanzo up into his arms. “It’s a fuckin’ raid. We gotta get Luds and Elize somewhere safe.”

Hanzo squawked and flailed a little at being princess carried, but that was his option right now. He didn’t feel a wheelchair was going to be his best bet if there were people swarming the Deadlock compound. He didn’t know what kind of people were raiding – they could be another gang for all he knew. If he was in his wheelchair, he’d just be an easier target.

It didn’t take long to rouse Ludger and Elize, thankfully, but by the time they’d managed that, the sounds outside were hitting a fever pitch. Gunshots were ringing out.

“Get down!” Jesse hissed. “Probably the feds, just…keep quiet and keep hidden. We’ll wait for a lull and then get the fuck out of here…”

Hanzo closed his eyes and held his breath as Jesse got them into a little hiding spot. Jesse was bodily in front of him, protecting him. _But I don’t want him to get hurt…_ He could feel the dragons stirring under his skin for the first time in ages – their protective urges rearing up in full force. He hoped he didn’t have to use them, but if his little surrogate family was threatened, he would protect them without hesitation.

It almost seemed like they were going to get out unscathed when heavy footsteps stopped right outside the door of their little shack. Hanzo could hear the voices, but couldn’t make out what was being said. _Can’t be anything good…_ He tucked his face against Jesse’s shoulder and held his breath and _hoped_ that his shitty luck wouldn’t fuck everyone over for once. _Just this once…please…_ He jumped hard when the door crashed in and clattered to the ground, but managed to keep silent. He held onto Jesse with shaky hands and closed his eyes.

“Case the building. Keep force to a minimum, bind any people found. Shoot as a last resort.” The man who spoke had a gruff, calm voice. The voice of a man who had been doing this kind of thing for _ages_.

“Understood.”

Hanzo twitched at that voice – even though it was a bit distorted, it sounded _so_ familiar. _It can’t be…_

He didn’t have time to dwell on his thoughts – Elize whimpered in fear and one of the soldiers in the shack tore the shelf that was hiding both Ludger and Elize down. Hanzo tensed when Elize shrieked.

“Shit! He’s got a gun!” Another soldier cried out.

“Hold it, he’s holding a little girl. Assess your situation, asshat. Lower your weapons.” The first man grunted out. “We don’t want trouble, lower your weapon and everything will be just fine.”

Hanzo was trembling, the dragons all but clawing under his skin to try and protect those they cared about, but he held back. Not yet…

He jumped when a gunshot rang out - Jesse had fired his gun. A warning shot. A distraction.

“Leave ‘em alone.” Jesse spoke in a clear, calm voice. One that Hanzo hadn’t heard yet – it sent chills down his spine. “Neither of ‘em want to be with Deadlock. Just let them go.”

There were a few whispers that Hanzo couldn’t make out, but the whispers couldn’t mean anything good. Especially when the whispers were followed by people shuffling around…

“Well who the fuck is he?” The first man bit out.

“…I think that’s _McCree!_ ”

A strange shiver went down Hanzo’s spine. It felt like something terrible was about to happen, and that was only confirmed when he heard the shotgun blast fire. In an instant, the dragons were billowing out of his arm, not to attack, just to intimidate, and to protect.

“Stop!” The oddly distorted voice shouted as he moved inhumanly fast into the line of fire with a sword drawn. “Stop, hold your fire.”

_I only know of one person who can move that quickly…_

“…you better have a fuckin’ explanation for this, Shimada. What the hell’s gotten into you??”

Hanzo felt like his heart was being squeezed in a vise. Shimada. _He can’t be…they said they killed him…they…I…_ He forced himself to breathe and tried to look up from Jesse’s shoulder, but couldn’t bring himself to. He was too afraid…

“Commander Reyes, that’s my brother!”

Hanzo felt like he was going to faint. _How is he alive? I should be happy…I shouldn’t feel like I’m being ripped apart…!_ He finally lifted his head and saw a man…or a cyborg? with a katana in his hands, still poised to deflect bullets at inhuman speeds. “…Genji?” He sounded so timid when he spoke, frightened. He hated that he sounded that way…but…he couldn’t help it…

“Okay, everyone put your fuckin’ weapons down. Now!” The first man barked – Commander Reyes. “Now explain what’s going on. How the hell is he your brother? I thought your brother was dead or missing or whatever.”

“I do not know how he got here nor do I know what happened to him, but I know for certain that the man who summoned the blue dragons is my brother.”

Hanzo felt his breath coming in sharp, fast pants. This was all too much, this was all too fast. And he couldn’t handle it right now.

“…Han…are you okay, darlin’?” Jesse whispered. “Just breathe for me. It’s gonna be okay…”

“Fine, we’re all heading back to Blackwatch. We’ll discuss this _there_.” Commander Reyes growled out.

Hanzo’s eyes went wide at the mention of Blackwatch and fell into a dead faint.

 

* * *

 

 

 **the mobage life** @praisegrailkun: @Sparrow has gone dark again…it’s only been a few days but it still makes me worry (꒪⌓꒪)

 

 **despite everything, it’s still you** @Sparrow: @praisegrailkun I am merely on a business trip, I will be back soon (⌐■_■)

 

 **the mobage life** @praisegrailkun: @Sparrow oh good! I’m glad you’re okay! (ノ*゜▽゜*)

 

 **despite everything, it’s still you** @Sparrow: @praisegrailkun (･ω <)☆

 

* * *

 

 

[3:12am] **mashu mashu mashu:** did you see Sparrow’s tweets? He almost sounded like he used to. It’s good to see him feeling better.

[3:25am] **FINALLY ACHILLES:** right? I’m glad that things are looking up for him.

 

* * *

 

 

 

When Hanzo woke up, everything hurt. His whole body ached like he’d run a marathon and his head felt like he’d been hit by a sledgehammer. He startled and looked around in fear – a mechanical beeping nearby started racing as well.

“Whoa, Hanners, it’s okay. I’m right here…” Jesse took his hand and squeezed. “We’re safe at Blackwatch. We’re in their medical bay. You remember what happened?”

Hanzo nodded and chewed on his lower lip. “…Deadlock was raided, we were shot at, my brother saved us, my brother is alive…” His voice was so small…

“That’s right…we’re safe. Been talkin’ with Genji and Commander Reyes. They want to make a deal with us…offer us a real job.” He paused and squeezed Hanzo’s hand. “…it’s a really good chance, Hanny…but it’s up to you.”

Hanzo knew what Blackwatch was – the covert ops branch of Overwatch. There was a natural distrust of both groups due to his yakuza history…and having been running with Deadlock for the last three months or so. The idea of working with Blackwatch was terrifying on many levels…

But at the same time…

Jesse said it was up to him – that meant everyone else had made their choice. That meant they were going to say yes. But Jesse was an all or nothing sort of guy when it came to family and their comfort…and if Hanzo said no, he wouldn’t go through with the deal… Hanzo wasn’t going to be the one to screw over such a good opportunity for Ludger and Elize just because he was _scared_.

“…I’m okay with it.” Hanzo didn’t sound entirely convincing, but he was going to firm on it. They would work with Blackwatch. “…sorry I fainted…”

“Can’t really blame you for fainting. You got some shocking news, honeypie.” Jesse shuffled onto the bed and settled in next to him. Hanzo appreciated the comfort. “…you really okay?”

Hanzo wasn’t entirely sure. He _wanted_ to be sure, but there was so much uncertainty surrounding everything that it was hard to let himself be happy that his brother was still alive. There were so many questions he needed to ask…and he wasn’t entirely sure he wanted to know all the answers…

“As okay as I can be…” Hanzo leaned into his touch. “Nervous, I guess.”

They lapsed into silence and Hanzo felt himself starting to drift off again. If he was falling asleep so easily he had to be absolutely exhausted. _I’m probably emotionally drained…_

“Oh good, he’s awake now.” Commander Reyes said as he walked closer. He sounded a good deal calmer now, softer spoken as well. “Oy, keep the PDA to a minimum, lovebirds. Don’t want to see that shit.”

Hanzo was about to shuffle away, but froze when he saw Genji walking alongside Gabe. The visor that obscured his face before was off and revealed that, yes, this was Genji. That Genji was alive.

“…do not believe him. He loves romantic comedies and is a softie.” Genji crossed his arms over his chest and smirked. But his expression softened just a little. “It is good to see you awake, anija. I was worried when you passed out like that.”

Hanzo felt his throat constrict – he never thought he’d hear Genji’s voice again, or see him, or _anything_ , and seeing him in the flesh was almost overwhelming. “I am glad to see you too, Sparrow.” He pulled out of Jesse’s arms and sat up slowly. “…what happened…?”

“I could ask the same of you.” Genji snorted. “…the elders attempted to kill me…Overwatch just happened to be in the area. They saved me. What happened to you…?”

Hanzo fidgeted with the blanket that covered his stumps and sighed. “…they cut them off for disobeying…took away everything…”

It was as far into things as he wanted to go. He didn’t want to talk about his five years in the cell, about how he dreaded being awake, about how he was used to kill enemies of the family…

“And how did you wind up with Deadlock?” Genji tilted his head. It seemed he understood that Hanzo didn’t want to talk about the details of what all the elders did and for that he was incredibly grateful. “McCree would not say. Commander Reyes was most displeased.”

Hanzo bit back a laugh. “…um…well. They kidnapped me. Kind of. The elders left me to die in the fire that Deadlock set. They’re the only reason I’m alive now.” It was so odd to say that so candidly.

“…but why would Deadlock be raiding the Shimada manor…?” Genji sounded utterly perplexed.

“We were lookin’ for a weapon that the Shimada used to get rid of their enemies. Never found it…but considering that blue light Hanzo can do, I’d figure he’s the weapon. Not that I ever told the Deadlock bosses that.”

Silence fell among the group until Commander Reyes cleared his throat. “I’m going to go over the deal now, if you don’t mind. Then you can catch up.”

Hanzo nodded and lapsed into silence as the man explained everything that would happen. It really was a good deal…especially for Elize. When the question was posed, he answered that he accepted without hesitation.

He just hoped it was the right choice…

 

* * *

 

 

Getting settled in at Blackwatch didn’t take very long at all. Soon enough they were placed in rooms, had physicals, medical care, three square meals a day…everything. They were even getting Hanzo fitted for prosthetics.

“Wait, I seriously get a phone?” Hanzo stared at Jesse, Genji, and Commander Reyes. “…you’re not fucking with me, right? I don’t appreciate being fucked with like that.”

A tiny bit of excitement bubbled up in his mind, though he was cautious enough to not let it get too big. He didn’t like getting his hopes up, it only made it hurt more when they were inevitably dashed.

“No, I’m not fucking with you. Of course you get a phone. Why wouldn’t you?” Commander Reyes quirked a brow up.

“…I have not had one in five years, Commander Reyes. I am not accustomed to having _privileges_.” Hanzo tried to not sound bitter and failed.

“Right. Uh…” He shook his head. “First, just call me Gabe when we aren’t on missions. And second, you get a phone. You kinda need one if you and Eastwood are going off on Blackwatch missions together. Kinda important in this day and age. Let’s us keep in contact and all.”

Gabe held the box out to Hanzo, which was taken with shaky hands. Hanzo stared down at it and felt a little choked up even looking at it. It really was silly to be getting like this…all emotional over something like a phone. But it was something that represented freedom and _fun_ to Hanzo…and it had been taken away from him for so long…

“Thank you…” He whispered as he opened the box.

“…anija? Are you okay?”

He nodded as he took the phone out of the box and booted it. It chimed to life and Hanzo smiled a little, a ghost of his former one.

“Honey, if you’d asked, I woulda let you play with mine…” Jesse seemed to be catching on that this was something that was _quite_ important to Hanzo. “I don’t mind sharin’ with you.”

Hanzo had honestly been embarrassed to ask if he could play on Jesse’s phone – it just felt too ridiculous. “It is fine…I didn’t want to impose.” He was entranced with the phone, barely looking up at Jesse or Genji or Gabe. He was impressed that there was a phone number set up already…as well as some apps.

“Still…” Jesse kissed Hanzo’s forehead. “This seems real important to you…”

Hanzo looked up, his cheeks a bit red. “…perhaps. I’m just glad to have one now.”

There was a moment of hesitation before he hit download on Fate/Grand Order and only another second before he started browsing his dropbox for his backup information.

“Hanzo…you seriously aren’t downloading a mobage right off the bat, right?” Genji deadpanned.

“Don’t judge me, ninja boy.” Hanzo groused as he inputted the transfer code and then moved to check his hidden bank accounts and everything else. “I’ve missed out on five years of it…”

“…aw fuck, don’t tell me _he’s_ an addict too, Genji. Please. I can only deal with one of you.” Gabe sounded _pained._

“…it’s cute that you think _I’m_ the bad one. My brother is the whale to end all whales. Maybe you should set a budget for him, Gabe~” Genji’s voice went all singsong.

Hanzo nearly dropped his brand new shiny phone with how quickly he looked up at his brother. “Don’t you dare, Genji. Don’t you _dare_.”

Silence fell between the four of them and Hanzo kept staring at his brother as though that alone would convince him to _not_ force Hanzo into a monthly mobage budget. It was his money and he would spend it as he saw fit! It wasn’t like he was going to forgo clothes or food for saint quartz. That was just stupid. He’d just be buying things that made him happy.

Sue him, he missed his pixel husbands!

“…so…what I’m gettin’ is that you two are mobile game addicts…and your brother is a whale? That’s not a nice thing to call your brother, Genji. He’s not fat!” Jesse snorted and shot a semi-offended look.

“Whale is a term for someone who spends money in the game. Think of it as a Moby Dick reference – _chasing the white whale_.” Hanzo hummed. “And I’m not an addict.”

More silence.

“…that’s it, I’m cutting the fucking wifi so y’all don’t spend all your fucking money on _jpegs_ of anime characters.”

“Excuse you, they’re .pngs, thank you very much.” Hanzo grumbled out.

 

* * *

 

[2:14pm] **Give Jack Pants:** omg omg omg

[2:15pm] **lulu says nya:** what?

[2:17pm] **Give Jack Pants:** SG’s FGO account went active. He popped up on my supports just now!

[2:18pm] **lulu says nya:** WHAT?? Omg I have to go check

[2:19pm] **lulu says nya:** holy shit he really is. Wait a second…didn’t he just…I’ll be back in a bit. Gotta check something. o/

[2:20pm] **mashu mashu mashu:** wait what? He’s back? You’re…you’ve gotta be…

[2:21pm] **mashu mashu mashu:** omg you aren’t joking

 

* * *

 

 

 **the mobage life** @praisegrailkun: I must be hallucinating from staying up too long because I swear @SimpleGeometry just showed up on my FGO supports for the first time in five years

 

 **it’s your friend’s Merlin!** @SimpleGeometry: @praisegrailkun  (^_−)☆

 

 **the mobage life** @praisegrailkun: @SimpleGeometry omfg I am fucking hallucinating wtf is going on

 

 **it’s your friend’s Merlin!** @SimpleGeometry: @praisegrailkun ヾ(⌐■_■)ノ♪

 

 **the mobage life** @praisegrailkun: @SimpleGeometry I have no idea what’s real anymore

 

 **it’s your friend’s Merlin!** @SimpleGeometry: @praisegrailkun (*・∀・)ノ゛

 

* * *

 

 

“Hanners, honeybun, stop trolling that poor kid, you’re gonna send him into conniptions.” Jesse stilled Hanzo’s hands. “So…I take it you were big into this Fate game or whatever? I think Luds plays that one…”

Hanzo supposed that Jesse was right, he shouldn’t be trolling people after being MIA for five years straight. Maybe he was enjoying feeling playful, he almost felt like his old self. Almost.

“I very much enjoy Fate/Grand Order.” Hanzo smiled as he pulled the app – he wanted to check how much apology quartz he’d managed to accumulate in the five years he was gone. He knew there was often an expiration date on things in the present box, but he was hoping. Then he’d check his paypal and bank account. “I guess I was kind of big in the fandom? Did a lot of guides and gacha pull videos. Helped people with team building too.”

“That’s sweet of you, sounds like it was real important to you.” Jesse hooked an arm around Hanzo’s waist and rested his chin on his shoulder. “I watched Luds play from time to time, the art is pretty cool. Never really got into those games because they’re basically gambling.”

He couldn’t exactly deny that. Mobile games _were_ gambling. But instead of money, you got pretty pictures of characters. And Hanzo had spent a significant amount of money on the game – it wasn’t like he spent money on much else back then. He figured he would spend it on something that made him happy – he still had that theory.

“Yeah, they are basically gambling, but I enjoy the story and characters.” Hanzo poked the start screen and nearly giggled when the classic chime went off as the game loaded in. Everything looked about the same and he felt warmth spread through his chest when his Merlin popped up on his screen. It was a bit disheartening to see the ‘login streak: day 1’ pop up, but it couldn’t be helped. “Alright…let’s see how much free quartz I have…”

“Huh…?”

“Premium currency.” Hanzo hummed as he opened his present box. It was completely full, which wasn’t surprising in the least. He hit the ‘accept all’ button and grinned as he collected a few limited craft essences and other things and then went to the summon page to check how much he had. “Oh my god…that’s…800 quartz. Oh my _god_.” And 20 summon tickets to boot. He exhaled and closed the app to pull up paypal.

“That a lot?”

“26 full pulls, yeah. And 20 summon tickets~” Hanzo tapped his paypal password in and tried to remember how much money he stashed in there. He was certain it was around $200. He never kept too much in paypal, he preferred to let his money actually gain interest.

Wait.

That balance wasn’t $200.

He blinked and stared at the screen of his phone and then rubbed at his face. He couldn’t be reading the number properly. He had to be hallucinating…there was no way that number said _**$2000**_. There was no way he put that much money in his paypal. He tapped through the transactions just to see how everything looked.

 

 

 

 

> **Paid by:**
> 
> [lulusaysnya@gmail.com](mailto:lulusaysnya@gmail.com)
> 
> **Amount:**
> 
> $10
> 
> **Note:**
> 
> I know it isn’t much, but I hope you’re doing okay.

 

Hanzo felt his throat tighten and the corners of his eyes burn.

 

 

 

 

> **Paid by:**
> 
> [mashupotatoes@yahoo.com](mailto:mashupotatoes@yahoo.com)
> 
> **Amount:**
> 
> $30
> 
> **Note:**
> 
> I heard things were rough for you, I hope this helps.

 

_Why did they send me money…?_

 

 

 

 

> **Paid by:**
> 
> [praisegrailkun@gmail.com](mailto:praisegrailkun@gmail.com)
> 
> **Amount:**
> 
> $100
> 
> **Note:**
> 
> We miss you, man. Take care of yourself and feel better. Hope this helps.

 

_I don’t understand…why would they…_

There were so many notes. Five years of them. Five years of people just sending him a little bit at a time to try and help him.

“Are you okay, honeybun…? You’re crying…” Jesse held him a little closer, his hand rubbing soothing circles against his back. “What’s wrong?”

Hanzo bit his lower lip to try and hold himself together, it wasn’t exactly working. “…I thought there was $200…”

“Okay…you have more…why is that…” Jesse’s voice trailed off as he started going through the notes from people. “Aw Hanny…they were worried about you…”

His breath hitched and Hanzo hid his face behind one of his hands as his shoulders shook from suppressing tears. It was hard to understand why these people had been so kind to him, why they cared enough to send him money. How could he comprehend people nice to him, _caring_ about him, when his own family had been the ones who hacked his legs off and then imprisoned him for five years…

“I don’t understand…” Hanzo bit out as tears streamed down his cheeks. “I don’t…”

“You don’t have to understand, sweetheart.” Jesse held him a little closer, rocking him gently. “Just know they care about you and what you well.”

Hanzo supposed that was true enough, but it still baffled him. “I…guess…?”

“How’s about I look through everything with you? I’ll hold you real close, how’s that sound baby doll?”

That sounded like it would help things, it would remind Hanzo that people _did_ care about him. It would keep him grounded through everything… He was about to respond to Jesse when the sound of footsteps made him freeze and then aggressively rub at his face to hide the fact that he’d been crying.

Ludger skidded to a stop in front of them, his chest heaving and his cheeks pink. He opened his mouth to speak, but only managed a wheeze.

“…uh…can we help you, Luds?” Jesse kept holding Hanzo close and sounded more than a little amused at the situation.

Ludger took a deep breath and calmed himself a little before speaking. “Why didn’t you say you’re SimpleGeometry??”

Hanzo felt his jaw hang slightly slack as he stared at Ludger. _This is all one big hallucination. I’m actually asleep. I’m going to wake up and everything will be fucking **normal.**_ “Um…?”

“You’re SimpleGeometry…you have to be…you just loaded up your super old account and SimpleGeometry is a super old account that’s been dark for five years that just popped up on my supports for the first time in five years.” Ludger set his hands on his hips. “I’m Lulu says Nya.”

 _One big hallucination._ “…wait…you’re…one of the ones who sent money?” _This can’t be real._

“Luds…why were you sendin’ him money when you can’t afford dinner for yourself half the time?!” Jesse shot him an incredulous look. “You are too nice for your own damn good, piebald.”

“Because I was worried about him! SG was always super helpful with everyone…kinda like everyone’s big brother. Everyone was worried when he went missing. Hell…you’re gonna have to check Reddit, Hanzo. And Twitter. There’s a Discord server too. There’s even a page on the Grand Order wiki for you.”

Hanzo stared at Ludger like he’d sprouted another head. _If this was a dream, I’d be awake by now…this…is ridiculous…_ “…am I going to start crying again?”

“Probably a bit.” Ludger admitted. “But there’s some hilarious theories on what happened?”

He looked at Jesse, his expression pleading with him that he keep holding him close through all this. Jesse merely nodded and kissed the back of his head. “Fine, bring it on. Let’s see what everything says…” Hanzo paused for a second and sighed. “We should get Genji here first.”

Ludger made a soft, confused sound. “Why?”

“…because he’s Sparrow.”

The sound Ludger made was what Hanzo imagined a blue screen of death sounded like when applied to a person.

Today was going to be a long day.

 

* * *

 

 

Hanzo held off on looking at _any_ of the social media until Genji was sitting with them. It was really adorable watching Ludger fanboy at them – a bit uncomfortable as well – but mainly cute. The look on his brother’s face was a little concerning though – it was mischievous. A mischievous Sparrow didn’t always bode well for Hanzo. It also had him more than a little concerned about what kind of things they were going to wind up seeing on social media…

“Why don’t we start with some of the Reddit stuff…?” Genji hummed as he typed on his laptop. “There is a lot to go through, anija.”

 

 

 

 

> **[discussion]:** theories on what happened to SimpleGeometry
> 
> Submitted 5 years ago by _tamamo_is_my_wife_

 

“Oh my god…” Hanzo stared at the computer screen as Genji scrolled down through the initial post. He supposed he could understand the concern after five months of someone being missing – but at the same time he was impressed that they were still _caring_ at that point. “…what the hell are these theories?”

Jesse hummed as he cuddled Hanzo close to his chest. “I mean…some of those aren’t bad guesses. You kinda did join a gang and were kidnapped. What the fuck does ‘ascended into the gacha’ mean though?”

“I was _already_ in a gang and I think ‘prisoner of war’ is more fitting…” Hanzo muttered under his breath. But he started snickering at Jesse’s question. “They’re implying I became part of the game.”

Genji snorted at that. “With as much money as you threw in, I wouldn’t be surprised. My favorite is them suggesting prison and not knowing what crime you would commit. I mean...I can think of tons off the top of my head. Arson.”

“Murder.” Hanzo chimed in with a snicker.

“Assault.”

It seemed they were just going to trade crimes back and forth now.

“Theft.”

“Forgery.”

“Jaywalking.” Genji laughed. “Oh, and that one time…that was public indecency, wasn’t it?”

Hanzo felt his cheeks go bright red. “Don’t you _dare_ tell that story, Sparrow. Don’t you dare. I will _end_ you.”

A slightly uncomfortable silence fell between the brothers and the others. _Perhaps we shouldn’t have listed off my numerous crimes…?_ Though Jesse knew that Hanzo was from a yakuza family, none of this should have been surprising.

Except the public indecency one.

“You should totally tell the story, Genji.” Jesse laughed. “I wanna know about Hanners being indecent in public.”

 _Betrayed by my boyfriend._ Hanzo scowled at everyone and started scrolling through the Reddit. “I believe we should continue to look through posts.”

There was a collective noise of assent and Hanzo kept scrolling through Reddit. Nothing was really standing out. He blinked when he heard Jesse’s text notification go off but continued browsing.

Then Jesse burst out laughing. “Aw Hanny, that’s _dirty_!” Of _course_ Genji sent Jesse the story. This was Hanzo’s luck. _Maybe I shouldn’t have wasted all of my luck on gacha games…_ “Want to give that a try sometime?” Jesse whispered against Hanzo’s ear. “I’m game if you are…”

 _Now is not the time to be thinking about that kind of thing, my younger brother is in the room._ Hanzo cleared his throat and shot Jesse a shaky smile. “Maybe. We’ll see.” His eyes caught something interesting looking though – _SimpleGeometry Torrid Love Affair??_ So he clicked on it.

Hanzo blanched and recoiled from the screen. “Oh god _no._ ” He hadn’t been responding to any theories or threads at all, but this one he needed to, he wasn’t going to let them think that. That was _gross_.

“…huh? What’s wrong?” Genji looked at the screen and jumped back a good foot. “Augh! No…gross.”

 

 

 

 

> **[discussion]:** SimpleGeometry Torrid Love Affair??
> 
> Submitted by _localmanrefusestodie_ 3 years ago
> 
>  
> 
> So we’re all thinking it. Sparrow and SimpleGeometry disappeared around the same time. Sparrow came back, but SG hasn’t.
> 
> Maybe they were dating and the break-up was bad??

 

 

 

 

> _SimpleGeometry_ [score hidden] 1 minute ago
> 
> I’m allowed to perform thread necromancy if the thread is about me, right?
> 
> Just going to put an end to this train of thought right now – Sparrow is my younger brother.
> 
> I wouldn’t date my brother, that’s just gross. ( ་ ⍸ ་ )
> 
> Oh, I’m back, btw.
> 
> (´・ω・)ﾉ

 

That’s about when Hanzo’s phone started blowing up from notifications. He glanced down at it constantly going off and looked over to Jesse, Genji, and Ludger. “…I’m a bit afraid to look at them.”

“We’ll check ‘em together, love.” Jesse kissed his cheek.

 

* * *

 

 

 **constantly begging for apologems** @bob_EMIYA: rumor has it that @SimpleGeometry is back. Not sure I believe it since hell isn’t frozen over

 

 **it’s your friend’s Merlin!** @SimpleGeometry: @bob_EMIYA how can you be certain that hell is frozen over when you aren’t actively perceiving it? Maybe it *DID* freeze over. Maybe it *DIDN’T* freeze over. You can’t be sure unless you check!

 

 **constantly begging for apologems** @bob_EMIYA: @SimpleGeometry did you just basically Schrodinger’s cat at me?

 

 **it’s your friend’s Merlin!** @SimpleGeometry: @bob_EMIYA ω(=＾・＾=)ω

 

 **constantly begging for apologems** @bob_EMIYA: @SimpleGeometry omfg

 

* * *

 

 

 

> **[discussion]:** SimpleGeometry IS ALIVE??
> 
> Submitted 10 minutes ago by _YorokobeShounen_
> 
>  
> 
> He’s posting on twitter and responded to something on here. People who still have him as a support reported that he’s logged back in.
> 
> REJOICE!

 

 

> _Sparrow_ [scored hidden] 8 minutes ago
> 
> Can confirm. My brother is alive and sitting right next to me reading these posts.

 

 

> _PlsBuffFionn_ [score hidden] 7 minutes ago
> 
> PEOPLE DIE WHEN THEY ARE KILLED, EXCEPT WHEN THEY’RE SIMPLEGEOMETRY

 

* * *

 

 

 **put Mori Ranmaru in the game you cowards** @DemonKingOfThe6thHeaven: @SimpleGeometry welcome back! Not sure why you were gone, but I’m glad that you’re okay!

 

 **it’s your friend’s Merlin!** @SimpleGeometry: @DemonKingOfThe6thHeaven thanks! Really feeling the love (灬♥ω♥灬)

 

 **QUICK META ISN’T DEAD!** @Sparrow: my brother @SimpleGeometry comes back to social media and gets a bunch of love, I come back to social media and I get nothing. NOT feeling the love (˵¯͒⌢͗¯͒˵)

 

 **Brynhild for life** @yanderes_r_us: @Sparrow @SimpleGeometry aw, we love you too!

 

* * *

 

 

[3:30pm] **lulu says nya:** so uh

[3:31pm] **lulu says nya:** I know SG and Sparrow in person and didn’t realize it?

[3:33pm] **mashu mashu mashu:** WHAT

[3:34pm] **KNK is back!!:** WHAT

[3:35pm] **mashu mashu mashu:** lulu you better not be fucking with us

 **\-- >**Brace yourselves, **SimpleGeometry** just joined the server

 **\-- >Sparrow** just joined. Hide your bananas

 

[several people are typing]

 

* * *

 

 

 

 

 

> **[discussion]** SimpleGeometry here
> 
> Submitted 5 minutes ago by _SimpleGeometry_
> 
>  
> 
> So…thank you to everyone who has been reaching out to me over the last five years – I’m still reading through all the messages. It’s really nice to come back to all these messages after everything that’s happened. Shit happened, but I’m back for good now. I’m in a much better place now, I promise.
> 
> I want to thank everyone who donated money to me over the years, it’s so sweet that you all did that for me. I’m not sure how I’ll thank all of you…
> 
> And…well…a lot of people (understandably!) removed me from their friend list. So…I’ve got 60 friend slots open. First come, first serve.
> 
> (´ ◕◞౪◟-)-☆
> 
> -SG

 

 

 

 

> _I_Am_The_Rules_   [score hidden] 4 minutes ago
> 
> Welcome back, dude. It’s really great to see you back

 

 

 

 

> _tamamo_is_my_wife_ [score hidden] 4 minutes ago
> 
> It feels like it’s been forever! I’m really glad to see you back and I’m glad you’re in a better place now.

 

 

 

 

> _StepOnMeJalter_ [score hidden] 4 minutes ago
> 
> WHOA WELCOME BACK!
> 
> Weird to ask this, but are you going to do gacha pull videos again? I’ve really missed yours

 

 

 

 

> _SimpleGeometry_ [score hidden] 3 minutes ago
> 
> I’ll be doing a video for my first pulls after five years! Just have to get a bit more set up o((*^▽^*))o

 

 

 

 

> _StepOnMeJalter_ [score hidden] 2 minutes ago
> 
> Awesome, glad to hear it. Welcome back <3

 

 

 

 

> _YorokobeShounen_ [score hidden] 1 minute ago
> 
> PEOPLE DIE WHEN THEY ARE KILLED UNLESS THEY ARE SIMPLEGEOMETRY

 

* * *

 

 

Hanzo muted his phone after about an hour of constant social media notifications. He was super flattered, but he was also _super_ drained. He slumped back against Jesse and closed his eyes. He never anticipated so many people caring about him, so many people trying to reach out to him for _five years_. He wiped at his face and hoped that the tears were gone. He hadn’t been able to help it…the amount of support was overwhelming and after so many years of loneliness and neglect.

“You okay, sweetheart?” Jesse murmured against his ear. “Whole lot of stuff got dropped on you today…”

“I’m fine, Jess.” Hanzo managed a smile, but kept leaning back against him. “Just a bit drained.” He paused as he considered his words. “You’ll really start playing the game though, right?”

“Hell yeah! I want to understand what it is when you guys start talking. I don’t get the whole ‘people die when they are killed unless they are SimpleGeometry’ bullshit.” Jesse rubbed the back of his head. “I just want to spend more time with you, ya know?”

Hanzo smiled and nodded his understanding. It would be nice to have someone who wasn’t Genji to share this with.

“Though, I sneaked a peek at your support party or whatever. And it’s a bunch of dudes…” Jesse snickered. “Isn’t this game full of pretty ladies?”

“Well, yeah. But I’m _super_ gay and whale hard for my favorites. Or pretty men.” Hanzo shrugged. He wasn’t even going to try and hide that fact. He paused. “I also roll for characters with good kits, but how they _look_ is way important too.”

Jesse laughed and kissed the back of his neck. “Maybe I just wanted to hear you describe yourself as ‘super gay.’”

Hanzo laughed at that and closed his eyes. Maybe he’d just take a nap for a little bit. That seemed like the best life choice at this point…

“Hey anija, let’s break the internet again. Time for a Twitter selfie.” Genji’s voice was all bright and happy. “We’ll cover our faces like we did before. Sound good?”

Hanzo was going to debate on the grounds of him looking awful because of the fact that he’d been crying – but they were going to be covering their faces up. His argument was completely invalidated before he even made it. _Stupid clever Sparrow…_

“…I’ve got a better idea.” Hanzo smirked. “We’ll do our selfie, then Jess and I will do one…and then grab Ludger and get him in on a group picture. We’ll _really_ break the internet.”

It wasn’t difficult to get a picture of him and Genji to work well, or one of him and Jesse to work well, but getting four people into a phone camera’s range was just _annoying_. But they managed it with them all crowding together and Hanzo having to sit on Jesse to really make it work. But the pictures were cute…

“Okay, you still want Cursed Arm Hassan, Genji?” Hanzo started editing the photos like this was every day business. He was already plunking down his custom Learning with Manga style Merlin onto all the pictures. “…Ludger, anyone you prefer?”

“Yes, Cursed Arm for me.” Genji puffed his cheeks out. “Because the quick meta isn’t dead.”

Hanzo snickered at that and started super-imposing Cursed Arm Hassan’s picture over Genji’s face.

“Oh…I think Karna for me.” Ludger grinned. “If that’s okay. And…how about ‘zerker Kintoki for Jesse?”

Hanzo paused and considered Kintoki for Jesse and instantly felt like an idiot. _How did I not make that connection…?_ He was going to suggest an archer for Jesse because _reasons_ , but Kintoki had that ridiculous belt buckle. He was _perfect_ for Jesse. And Karna somehow _really_ suited Ludger. Maybe it was because of how pale they both were…

“Can I see this Kintoki before you plaster him on my face?” Jesse deadpanned. Hanzo obliged his boyfriend and pulled up a picture of Kintoki and watched a smile break across Jesse’s face. “I want that belt buckle. It’s cool.”

Somehow, Hanzo knew he was going to say something like that.

“Perfect. Done and done.” Hanzo quickly finished editing them – making sure that there weren’t location tags on the photos. “Time to post them.”

 

* * *

 

 

 **QUICK META ISN’T DEAD!** @Sparrow: hella, @SimpleGeometry and I are back in business! (faces hidden to spare the internet of our blinding beauty)

[image attached]

 

 **it’s your friend’s Merlin!** @SimpleGeometry: dragging my boyfriend into Fate hell with all of us! Everyone be nice to HighNoon!

[image attached]

 

 **the mobage life** @praisegrailkun: @SimpleGeometry aww! Look at you two. Cute! Welcome to the game, HighNoon. Remember, you’re stuck here forever!

 

 **QUICK META ISN’T DEAD!** @Sparrow: And one more picture for today. @SimpleGeometry and his boyfriend HighNoon, @LuluSaysNya and me all in one picture. (つ▀¯▀)つ

[image attached]

 

 **put Mori Ranmaru in the game you cowards** @DemonKingOfThe6thHeaven: @Sparrow @SimpleGeometry @LuluSaysNya wait you all know each other IRL?

 

 **constantly begging for apologems** @bob_EMIYA: @Sparrow @SimpleGeometry @LuluSaysNya …hell really DID freeze over…

 

 **it’s your friend’s Merlin!** @SimpleGeometry: @bob_EMIYA @Sparrow @LuluSaysNya ~(=^‥^)ノ☆

 

 **constantly begging for apologems** @bob_EMIYA: @Sparrow @SimpleGeometry @LuluSaysNya FUCKING MEME LORD

 

* * *

 

 

They all wound up silencing their phones after about ten minutes of dealing with the constant notifications.

 

* * *

 

 

Hanzo exhaled slowly and tried to keep himself calm. All he had to do was press a button and start the stream, that’s all he had to do. It wasn’t even a hard task…

But he was having trouble with it.

“It’s okay, pumpkin. We don’t gotta do this. They’ll understand if you aren’t ready.” Jesse leaned against him. “But I’m right here with you if that helps.”

It did help some, but Hanzo was still nervous. It was his first time doing a gacha pull video in five years – and it was his first time doing one live. He’d already made it so their faces would be covered by their characters – after all, they couldn’t risk showing their faces when they worked with Blackwatch.

“I know…” Hanzo smiled and turned his head. “Thanks for doing this with me. I appreciate it…I like playing the game with you.”

“Anything for my honeybee.” Jesse grinned. “Plus…seeing you geek out is really damn cute. I love it.”

Hanzo blushed a bit at that revelation and nudged him gently. “Love you, cowboy…let’s get this show going.”

Wait…did he just say that he loved Jesse…?

Hanzo felt his voice catch in his throat – he’d never said that before and he says it right before they stream _live._ He hit the go button before Jesse could respond - he didn't want to be all flustered throughout their whole video, though he likely would be anyway. “Hey all! SimpleGeometry here with HighNoon. Ready for some gacha pulls?”


End file.
